My stepmother's burden is my ex-girlfriend.

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Don't you understand?

Don't you understand that for me there is no greater despair than this?

-- Uh, summer homework... have you finished it?

I think this moment is another opportunity to pull back from the brink.

I can truly erase that summer vacation, which holds no memories, from my mind. At that moment, we'll definitely have a chance to rekindle our past relationship... I think there must be certain words that can make all of this possible.

However, I cannot choose to forgive.

I cannot forgive myself.

and so……

-- Hmm. I finished writing it since I had nothing else to do.

You stiffened slightly.

From that time onward, a long period of self-harm began.

AM06:03 ■ Cultural Festival Morning

The morning light streaming through the curtains made me squint, and I slowly got out of bed.

This isn't my room. It's the school's lounge.

I blinked a few times and glanced at the clock. Six in the morning. I haven't gotten up this early in a long time.

Looking around the room, each of the eight beds had a female executive committee member lying on it, emitting soft breathing. This was a thoughtful gesture from the senior students for the juniors, who had decided to stay overnight at school yesterday to finish their final work. Meanwhile, the male students, also first-years, were protesting that they had to sleep in sleeping bags on the large communal beds.

Although there's still some time, I don't want to go back to sleep. Today is the official start of the cultural festival, the busiest day for the festival's executive committee. I need to muster my energy and do a good job.

Anyway, I'll go wash my face first. I quietly left the lounge wearing my workout clothes, which I was wearing instead of pajamas.

Before going to the restroom, I peeked into the meeting room next door from the hallway. The committee members, sleeping in sleeping bags, were roughly divided into male and female groups, huddled together on either side. The meeting room was much larger than the classroom, but it was still so crowded it looked cramped. Seeing boys and girls sleeping together in a large dormitory like this actually made me a little envious, but I was afraid I'd be too nervous to sleep…

"……strangeness."

On the one hand, because we were up all night yesterday, almost everyone was still asleep. But there was only one sleeping bag left, now just an empty shell. I remember the person who slept there was probably…

I kept this in mind as I went to the bathroom sink to wash my face. I looked pretty good. I was a little worried about sleeping in an unfamiliar environment, but it seemed like I was fine.

Returning to the silent corridor, a sense of disbelief washed over me. In four hours, the campus would surely be bustling with people. But now, only the sound of my footsteps could be heard…

Like the calm before a storm. I suddenly felt a urge to explore this tranquility, so I decided to wander around the campus.

Walking down the icy, bone-chilling corridor, I would peek into the classroom or look out the window.

When I got to the stairs, I went up without thinking much. I hadn't planned to leave the school building anyway, and I rarely went to the upstairs area.

I turned a corner on the landing and continued upstairs, where I saw a door.

It's the door leading to the top floor.

I remember this door was usually closed. But I think some senior student said that it was temporarily open because of the need to lower a long curtain.

Since now is the only time to go in, and the opportunity is rare anyway...

I gripped the cold doorknob and turned it, and the door opened.

"........."

Then, what stole my attention was neither the open space nor the boundless blue sky.

Instead, he sat alone in front of the tall iron fence, his familiar figure visible.

"...Water bucket?"

Wearing sportswear, Shuidou sat motionless with his back against the iron mesh, only turning his neck to look down at the ground.

He heard the sound, turned around to look at me, and whispered, "It's you..." before turning his eyes back to look beyond the wire mesh.

I closed the door first, then walked towards him and said:

"What are you doing here? Aren't you cold?"

"Yes, a little... I should have brought a coat."

"...How long have you been here?"

"I've been here for about half an hour. I woke up too early..."

How strange, this night owl... Maybe sleeping in a dormitory just means he didn't get enough sleep.

"Are you alright...? If you didn't sleep well, you can sleep in the bed I slept in..."

"The bed you slept in?"

Shuidou gave me a cold laugh, as if he thought I was a fool.

"You've made great progress! You've overcome your shyness?"

"It's not like anything will happen! The beds in the break room are public facilities! ...Besides, if it were you, it seems a bit too late to start complaining about this now..."

To be honest, I didn't think before I said that. What was I thinking, suggesting this guy sleep in the bed I just woke up in?!

"I regret to decline. Rather than have a man sleep in a room where a woman is sleeping, I'd rather sleep in a sleeping bag."

"Oh, I see... That makes sense."

To hide my embarrassment, I followed the direction of the water basin's gaze.

There's nothing special about it. Just rows of stalls that are currently empty.

"...Actually, I could have gone home."

Mizuto suddenly spoke to himself.

"But I still feel bad about it... so I came here to rest. I can relax more when I'm alone."

--What are you doing here?

I finally realized that he was answering my question.

Take a break. Indeed, this man, who is an individualist by nature, has suddenly been thrown into an activity that requires him to stay overnight to prepare for a cultural festival, an event brimming with youthful energy. Perhaps he won't be able to concentrate without making sure he has some personal time.

Since that's the case, I should understand his feelings and leave as soon as possible.

--Wrong!

Get this straight, this is a great opportunity! I have to ask him to go to the cultural festival with me! I kept telling myself that we'd be doing executive committee work together anyway... using that as an excuse to keep putting it off, but there's no better time than now.

"I'm asking you... I'm asking you."

I stood beside the still water trough, glancing at his expression frequently as I spoke.

"Did you make plans to go to the cultural festival with your classmates from Dongtou or anyone else?"

"No, I didn't make any special plans. But that girl definitely has nowhere to stay anyway, so I'm thinking of going to keep her company when I have some free time."

Very good... It seems they weren't planning on having a date at the cultural festival.

"Since that's the case... let me think... in the afternoon! After the executive committee's inspection work and the mock shop shifts are over!... how about we go shopping together? To the cultural festival...! -- Ah, or maybe I should just ask Higashi-san to go with me!"

I backed down!

The image of him refusing me under the pretext of having to accompany his classmate in the east flashed through my mind, which made me back down at the last minute!

No, but... okay, that's fine too! It's better than not being able to get a date at all! Let's look on the bright side!

Shuidou glanced at me and said:

"...Alright. Besides, I'm on the executive committee, and Isana didn't do anything at the school festival. She'll probably start feeling inferior for no reason again. It's probably better with you here. If it were just the two of us, we'd probably just be holed up in the library."

"Very easy to imagine..."

I simply cannot imagine what it would be like for Shuidou and Dongtou to browse through the cultural festival's mock store together.

"Then...it's a deal?"

"Um……"

I did it! Although it wasn't quite what I imagined, I still succeeded!

The moment I felt the weight lifted from my shoulders, a chill ran through me. It felt like I was getting a little cold.

"Hey, shouldn't we go back? Don't you think it's colder here than I expected?"

"You really should go back. You're too frail."

"No, it wasn't as exaggerated as it was in junior high...! Wait, I'm asking you."

"I'm fine right now. Don't worry, I'll be back before I catch a cold."

"oh……"

Although I hesitated a bit, I left Mizuto alone and returned to the school building.

Just before the gate closed, I saw Shuidou still doing nothing, looking down at the campus through the iron fence.

AM09:18 ■ You look more mature than usual

"Ooh ooh--"

Seeing Kawabata's utter embarrassment, I quietly clapped my hands.

He was dressed as a scholar in a kimono and hakama. His bright hair color and styled ends remained the same, and surprisingly, he looked quite good. He had a unique charm compared to Irito-kun, with a slightly underdog vibe—well, those who like it will like it, right?

"Not bad at all. Congratulations on not having to shave your head."

"You're going to shave my head just because I don't look good in this?!"

"Isn't it because you're supposed to play a scholar? Like, the kind of guy who seems really smart, right? The complete opposite of you."

"Even shaving your head won't change that!"

"That's true. If that made you smarter, I'd shave my head every time I took a test."

"Ugh... I can't talk back..."

I laughed out loud, then gently grabbed my sleeve with my fingers and pulled it up to show Kawanami what I looked like.

"So? How do I look—?"

Of course, I am also a slender lady who wears hakama and boots.

Seeing me grinning mischievously as I waited for an answer, Kawabata rolled his eyes at me and said:

"No, I already saw it when I tried it on. What's there to look at now..."

"I'll praise you as many times as I want!"

"What are you doing? Giving me that girlfriend look?"

"Even if you're not my girlfriend, you have to keep praising me! Is that smirking face of yours just for show?!"

"Sorry, it's just for decoration!"

Kawanami tilted his head with a sour face, looking at the top of my head.

As usual, I tied my hair in a high ponytail, but I made a slight change today.

"...Is the ribbon you tied different from usual?"

"Isn't it cute? It's a Japanese-style design that goes well with this outfit──♪"

"It feels like a Japanese confectionery packaging bag—ouch! Hey, stop kicking me! Don't kick me with your boots on!"

"You're not allowed to give me any more! You're putting on that 'I'm good at sweet-talking girls' face!"

"You idiot, don't try so hard to make me see you as a woman!"

I kicked him several times with a low kick, just as my good friend Maki peeked out from behind the curtain into the staff area and called out, "Hey—"

"Hey you couple over there—it's almost time for the show to start, stop your stand-up comedy and get ready—"

"Who are you calling a couple?!"

"I'm so heartbroken. Irito is so popular, and Yueyue is putting on a couple's comedy routine. Now even Nasuka has a boyfriend. It feels like I'm the only one feeling empty and lonely! Alas..."

"Maki, don't worry. You're tall and handsome."

"Being popular with girls is meaningless, okay!"

Maki, who joined the basketball club, was tall and slender, and looked very cool in hakama (traditional Chinese clothing), naturally winning the favor of the girls. But things didn't go as planned; girls like her were often not interested in other women.

"I really want a boyfriend! I wonder if anyone will hit on me today?"