My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 115

FROM Zaimuzuo

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What? They changed their email address!

Hachiman! Hachiman~~~~

FROM MAILER-DAEMON

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Volume 5, Part 4: Unfortunately, no one knows where Hiratsuka Shizuka's red thread went.

What food is the strongest?

Curry? Shabu-shabu? Sushi? Soba noodles?

Sukiyaki? Tempura? Grilled meat? Or dessert?

None of that.

Ramen is the best.

That's right, ramen.

For a lonely high school boy, that was a familiar taste.

When I don't know what to eat, ramen is always the first thing that comes to mind.

After school, I would detour to my usual ramen shop.

Discovering new ramen shops while out shopping is a good idea.

When the night is quiet and I feel a little empty in my stomach, I boil a kettle of water and then slurp up noodles with a slurping sound.

However, going to a ramen shop with your lover on a date—

Stop messing around! That's prohibited!

Don't sit around the bar and be all lovey-dovey!

There are still people in line behind you!

If you want to show off your love, go to your favorite Starbucks. Ramen shop counters are not places for you to flirt!

Can you please think about the customers who are waiting in line behind you and are almost blinded by your brilliance?

Ramen is a food that should be enjoyed by one person.

If you keep chatting with people, not only will the soup get cold, but the noodles will also become soggy.

That's why there's a single seat at the counter, and even a curtain to prevent the kitchen from seeing out. Ichiran Ramen's "Flavor Concentration Counter" is a major invention in the ramen industry. I saw them mention they had filed a patent application, but I don't know if it's been approved.

The topic has gone too far.

In short, ramen is the food that suits me best.

A bowl of the finest ramen is enough to heal my proud and aloof soul.

That's right, ramen.

× × ×

I wake up at an awkward time and miss mealtimes, which has become a regular occurrence during summer vacation.

Someone will definitely tell me that if I'm aiming to be a stay-at-home dad, I should cook for myself in times like these.

That guy is so naive.

A true housewife would only give her husband 500 yuan for meals, and then spend his money to enjoy a luxurious lunch. This may be my prejudice, but I want to be that kind of housewife and claim alimony in a divorce.

I've decided to become a stay-at-home dad, so I've decided to follow the example of housewives and go out for a lavish lunch. Thanks to the alchemy of my cram school scholarship, I'm now a millionaire. Call me the Alchemist of Money.

I'll have ramen for lunch today—the moment I made that decision, my stomach couldn't accept any other food.

Chiba is a top-tier battleground for ramen. With Matsudo leading the charge, competition around stations like Chiba, Tsudanuma, and Hon-Hachiman is fierce; recently, even snack-style ramen like Takeoka-style ramen and Katsuura tantanmen have expanded nationwide.

While familiar restaurants are certainly reassuring, after a while, I still hope to discover new restaurants on my own.

If you're traveling with other people, you have to cater to their tastes, or you can't help but show off, "Oh ho ho ho~ I know a really good restaurant~ Aren't you jealous?", making it impossible to have a proper adventure.

But if you're alone, you don't have to worry about so many hassles and can swagger into the store. This mobility is key to discovering new things and allowing food culture to continue to evolve.

In short, the lone wolf is always willing to be a pioneer and is a modern adventurer full of the spirit of trying new things.

Since that's the case, let's try out some undeveloped ramen shops near our home today. The saying "The lighthouse of Jōhachi shines far but not near" is very true; we should break through our current blind spots. What a brilliant plan, a brainstorming session that turns the argument against "Tokyoites don't actually go to Tokyo Tower" into a nutshell.

I took a bus for a bumpy ride and got off at Makuhari Beach near my destination to walk.

Since I'm likely to wander around this area after school, I thought it would be best to develop a new ramen shop, so I had my eye on one of the shops a while ago.

I kept moving forward under the bright summer sun.

Ding-dong! Ding-dong!

The humid, sticky air made me feel unbearably hot, but the clear, melodious church bells dispelled it all.

There are many high-end hotels and wedding venues in the area, so a wedding ceremony must be taking place here.

I could feel the magnificent atmosphere, and the blessings of the crowd could be heard through the walls.

This is my first time attending a wedding, so I'm just taking a quick look.

What met my eyes was a beautiful, blissful scene, but for some reason, a dark object seemed to appear in the corner of my vision...

I rubbed my eyes and observed carefully. Don't let your mind wander anywhere, and before you know it... you'll see everything—under the guidance of the monk Takuan (Note 33, a quote from Takuan in "Ronin Swordsman"), I kept my eyes fixed on the dark figure.

The shadowy figure, clad in black, exuded an aura of malevolence. All light was absorbed, even sunlight distorted. In the otherwise blissful hall, only there lingered a near-obsessive resentment, uttering a low murmur, "Die, all of you, Amen..."

Yes, I definitely know that person.

"I hope you get married soon too~"

"Shouldn't it be Xiaojing's turn next?"

"Xiaojing, Auntie has found you another great man! This time there won't be any problems. Would you like to meet him?"

"Jing, Dad has started saving money for his future grandchild..."

Every time someone spoke to the dark figure, she would tremble convulsively. Her spiritual pressure... had vanished?

I seemed to see something I shouldn't have, so I quickly looked away and pretended nothing was wrong and continued walking.

However, I cannot forget.

—When you gaze into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you. (Note 34: A famous quote from the German philosopher Nietzsche.)

"H-Hikigaya!"

The black figure suddenly shouted.

An elderly couple standing beside the dark figure turned and stared at me when she called out. I instinctively nodded to them, and they actually returned the gesture… What's going on? Does this mean I've met their parents? In that case, I guess I'll have to ask her to take responsibility, marry me, and take good care of me.

The shadowy figure turned around and hurriedly said to the couple:

"Th-those are problem students in my class! I-I have to go to work! Well, that's all for now!"

Then, she rushed over here, her high heels clicking as she walked.

"Hachiman! You've come at the perfect time! We're saved!"

The dark figure—correction, upon closer inspection it was actually a beautiful older woman in a black dress—grabbed my hand and happily left the scene.

"Ah, um, wait..."

When a beautiful older woman holds your hand, what choice do you have but to obey her?

We walked for quite a while before finally stopping after turning the corner and entering the park.

"Phew... I finally escaped..."

This woman gently stroked her large breasts.

Her black evening gown traced elegant curves along her body, and a fur draped over her snow-white nape as an adornment; her jet-black, lustrous hair, combed upwards, echoed the dress; and beneath gloves of the same color as the dress, the hand that held mine was unexpectedly soft.

"Excuse me……"

"Huh? Oh, sorry for suddenly dragging you here."

A beautiful woman with an outstanding temperament smiled at me, pulled me towards a park bench, took out cigarettes from her purse, tapped them, and stuffed the tobacco back in.

This action was completely out of character for her appearance, making her look like a middle-aged man.

With a click, the 100-yuan lighter lit the cigarette, and wisps of smoke rose slowly.

Although the scene I saw earlier was so different from usual that I almost got confused, seeing her now, I am 100% sure that she is Shizuka Hiratsuka, our service club instructor.

Oh, so if she dresses up nicely, she can become a great beauty too...

"Excuse me, is it really okay for you to just run away? It's a wedding ceremony, isn't it?"

"Don't worry, I left a gift money."

"But don't they usually have parties too?"

"What? I didn't expect you to be so worried about me."

"No, that's a rare opportunity to meet someone of the opposite sex..."

"...Ha, that was my cousin's wedding ceremony, I'm not the point at all."

Hiratsuka-sensei sadly looked away, and said indistinctly while smoking a cigarette.

"Actually, I didn't really want to go in the first place. I'm older than those cousins, so they'll be hesitant about me; the other aunties will only talk to me about weddings, and my parents are so nagging... I'll pay the wedding gift and then have to listen to so many lectures, it just doesn't seem worth it..."

After she finished speaking, she exhaled a long puff of smoke with a sigh and crushed the cigarette in her hand.

Hearing these words, I had nothing to say...

After a brief pause, she rallied and asked me:

"What are you doing here?"

"I was originally planning to go eat ramen."

"Ramen! I never knew it could be like this (Note 35: Imitating a line from 'The Solitary Gourmet': 'Takeout! I never knew it could be like this.')"

Hiratsuka-sensei suddenly seemed to have an idea and said something, her previously despondent look vanishing and regaining its brilliance.

"So, I've been helping out at the reception desk the whole time and haven't had a proper chance to eat... Perfect, I'll come along too."

"Oh, I don't care."

So this time, I led the way, with Ms. Hiratsuka following behind in high heels. Speaking of which, her outfit was truly glamorous; a lot of people were looking at us.

We arrived at a busy street, and pedestrians kept glancing our way. No wonder, with the teacher dressed so elegantly and looking so beautiful, it was impossible for anyone not to take a second look.

The teacher himself didn't seem to care much and continued to talk to me as usual.

"By the way, I heard that some future juniors have been discussing further studies with you. Even during the holidays, you haven't forgotten about the club's activities; that's truly commendable."

"That's not how it is. But how did you know, teacher...?"

I think what you did is a bit scary...

"I heard it from your sister."

"When did you become so close to my sister...?"

Komachi's encirclement has covered everyone I know; that's amazing.

So, isn't the ABCD encirclement now complete? Is this really okay? A, Yui-chan, the idiot; B, Hiratsuka-sensei, the violent one; C, Komachi, the cute one; D, who is that Kawa-something? (Note 36 originally refers to the countries that imposed an economic blockade on Japan during World War II. A is the United States, B is the United Kingdom, C is China, and D is the Netherlands, each taking the first letter of their respective country names. Here, ABCD are taken from the first letters of the Japanese Romanized spellings of idiot, violent, cute, and who.) It seems that even without an economic blockade, I'll have to use blockade tactics to fight them.

"You have a wonderful younger sister. Even I think it would be nice to have one. Oh, of course, I don't mean anything by it."

"The teacher and Komachi are going to be sisters? With their age difference, they might even be mother and daughter, hahaha..."

"Hikigaya..."

Oh no, I'm about to get punched... I reflexively closed my eyes to brace for the impact.

However, the teacher's fist did not come down. I opened my eyes in surprise and saw that Hiratsuka-sensei had fallen into a slump again.

"Hearing jokes like that now feels a bit hurtful..."

"I'm so sorry!"