My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 129

"I'm going out to take care of something."

Of course, I couldn't just loudly announce that I was going to skip class and sleep in the infirmary. If you want to brag about your criminal acts, I suggest going to Twitter (Note 14: Twitter is a platform where users frequently boast about their criminal acts, thus incurring public outrage).

Upon hearing my reply, Totsuka slightly turned his head to one side.

"However, we need to decide on the work assignments for the school anniversary activities in the next class, so it's best to stay in the classroom."

"……Really?"

In the last class meeting, everyone only decided what to perform, so this time we will probably discuss more specific details.

"...It doesn't matter, I don't care."

In any case, it doesn't change the fact that I just need to stand there as usual. I exist purely for the sake of existing.

Once everyone enters the preparation stage, the most useful thing I can do is to stand still and imitate the eerie totem pole.

No matter what work I'm assigned, it won't change my situation: when I have nothing to do, I'll casually wander up behind someone, observe what they're doing, and say "Oh~~" knowingly, or I'll take the initiative and wait for them to ask, "Can I help you?"

"...Just put me wherever there's an empty spot."

Totsuka nodded with a puzzled expression; I didn't know if he understood what I was thinking.

"Yeah, I understand."

"Well then, please help me~"

I waved gently and left the classroom.

× × ×

I strolled down the corridor, listening to the echoing school bells, and slowly made my way to the health room on the first floor of the special building.

When class time arrives, the corridors are no longer filled with students loitering around, and the original tranquility is restored.

As I approached the infirmary, I noticed the temperature had dropped slightly. I gently knocked on the door and entered, where the smell of disinfectant immediately filled the air.

A female student was chatting with the nurse in the health room. When they saw me walk in, they immediately shut up.

The unfamiliar female student glanced somewhat sheepishly at her phone. For some reason, I had a feeling I'd done something wrong. Sorry, hehe.

"Oh my, isn't this Xiaojing's child?"

The female teacher was dressed in white and was quite young. She first looked me up and down before speaking.

That way of addressing me is inappropriate; it might make people mistakenly think that I have a parent-child relationship with the teacher. Be careful, or you might get scolded! Mainly, Hiratsuka-sensei will scold you because you've stepped on an age landmine.

I think I have a bit of a cold.

I feigned weakness and briefly explained my purpose. Whenever this happens, I put on a superb performance; you could easily call me a "cold controller." Wow, what a title! So cool it's almost comical! Speaking of which, the Japanese word for cold contains both "wind" and "evil," such a quirky and childish naming convention.

"It's dangerous to make judgments without professional knowledge. Come here and let me take a look."

Unfortunately, the nurses in the infirmary simply ignored my efforts to put on an act.

Tsk, no wonder he's a seasoned veteran who's dealt with countless truant students. Will he not be easily fooled by this level of acting?

The teacher stared intently into my eyes, as if to expose my lie—correction, her gaze was so sharp that "glare" might be a more accurate word. If this were the world of Pokémon, my defense would drop significantly (Note 15: When a Pokémon uses a glare attack, it lowers the opponent's defense).

"...Yes, you have a cold."

"You diagnosed it so quickly..."

So, what was the point of that last sentence? I gave her an indignant look, expressing my dissatisfaction. The school nurse, seeing this, chuckled.

"Because your eyes look lifeless, you must have caught a cold."

According to her logic, wouldn't I be catching a cold all year round? And what's with all this talk about being lifeless? Even if London is lifeless, the Paris sun shines brightly. Whose rising star are you? (Note 16: "London's weather is gloomy, Paris's sunshine is bright" is a lyric from the ending theme of the anime "Nadja, the Rising Star.")

The teacher jotted down some information on the clipboard, then turned to me and asked:

"So, what are your plans? Would you like to rest here for a while?"

She asked so casually, as if asking, "Do you need to adjust your gear here?"

"Okay, sure."

"Go to the bed inside."

After a brief instruction, I followed her orders and went to the bed separated by a curtain. There was a neatly folded blanket on the bed. After I lay down, I spread the blanket out to cover my stomach.

Through the pink curtain, the two outside continued their previous conversation. As I drifted into a half-dream, their voices lingered faintly in my ears.

× × ×

How can it be……

When class ended and I returned to the classroom, I was shocked to find that I had been pushed to join the school anniversary executive committee.

The words "Hachiman" appeared on the blackboard, below "Executive Committee." Ugh... this is a conspiracy!

I admit that I said I would be assigned to any available position, and that it didn't matter to me what kind of work I was assigned; even if the job was insignificant, I was willing to accept it silently.

But even so, wouldn't those people feel guilty if I were given the tasks that no one else wanted to do?

Shouldn't the task that won't get in the way be assigned to the lone wolf in these situations? In fact, that's always been the case.

The strategy of "Since you happened to be on leave, we decided to make you class monitor (laughs)" is quite amusing for the central figures in the class to prank each other, so it's not without its fun for them. But if you use it on people from different cultural backgrounds... is that declaring war? Not really... not really... (Note 17 is a line from Otsuki in "Gambling Breaker").

I stood frozen in front of the blackboard, not moving at all, when someone patted me on the shoulder.

"Do I need to explain?"

Even without turning around, I know exactly who this person is.

Here she is! Hiratsuka Shizuka, a female teacher approaching thirty and currently most eager to get married.

"Respect is no excuse," I said, remaining silent and only conveying my request to the teacher through my eyes. The teacher sighed softly, checked the time, and then said:

"The next class is about to start, and we still can't agree on who should be the executive committee member for the school anniversary celebration, so I've directly appointed you as the one."

Excuse me, Chinese teacher, wait a minute. Isn't that how you use "therefore"? I can't hear any connection between them at all.

"Teacher, what are your plans...?"

"What's the meaning?"

"And you still ask what I mean... What do you think of a lone wolf? Forcing a lone wolf to participate in class activities will only lead to tragedy!"

I'm saying this for the sake of my close classmates, hoping they can enjoy the event. My presence would only make them hesitant. If I were given a job with little influence, unimportant, and whose presence or absence wouldn't matter, wouldn't everyone be able to enjoy the event without any worries? I've decided to advocate for non-interventionist non-negotiation, a direct counterpoint to Gandhi's nonviolent disobedience!

"I've considered asking for your opinion... but didn't you say yourself that you're open to any job?"

Alas… I couldn’t help but sigh, turning my gaze to the window, where I saw Totsuka, her face full of apology, her hands clasped together in a gesture of repentance. Ah! How adorable… Is that happiness formed by the overlapping wrinkles of her two hands? Na…mu… (Note 18: From an advertisement for a Buddhist altar supply store in Japan.)

Just as I was getting distracted by other things, Hiratsuka-sensei frowned, declaring that I couldn't escape this trouble. Run—away—ah—

"Okay, okay, get back to your seats. If you keep dragging this out, we won't have to attend class anymore. We'll decide on the rest after school."

× × ×

Even after school ended, the classroom remained noisy.

Everyone continued to discuss the division of labor for the school anniversary activities.

This matter was supposed to be decided during the class meeting just now, but because deciding on the boys' school festival executive committee member took too much time, Mr. Hiratsuka finally used force and directly decided that I would be chosen. This is exactly what is called "power harassment"...

Damn it! If I had more power, I could just pass the work to someone else! This layer upon layer of bureaucratic harassment is the perfect depiction of Japan's vertically integrated society. At this moment, I strongly feel that I am also Japanese.

Alright, now the purpose of everyone staying is to decide on the female student council executive committee members for the school anniversary celebration.

The bespectacled class monitor was presiding over the meeting on the podium. I didn't know his real name; everyone just called him "Class Monitor." If our class monitor were a girl, she might need another name due to her personality traits (Note 19: In the original text, the male class monitor is "ルㄧム長" and the female class monitor is "委程長". In anime and manga, "委程長" often has cute elements and attributes). But unfortunately, he's a boy, so calling him "Class Monitor" is sufficient.

"Well... then, which girl would like to volunteer to serve as an executive committee member? Please raise your hand."

When the class monitor said that, the students naturally didn't react. He had come to terms with it, and with a slight sigh, he said:

"If we can't decide anything like this, let's play rock-paper-scissors..."

"what?"

Upon hearing the words "rock-paper-scissors," Miura immediately interrupted the class monitor loudly. Startled, the monitor stammered, "Um...ah..." unable to utter a word for a long time. The woman's loud shout silenced everyone on the stage. Did she come from some temple? (Note 20: "A loud shout to expel evil spirits" is a series of posts on the 2ch discussion board. In the original story, Mr. T was from a temple and used this method to eliminate the female ghost and resolve the crisis.) People from temples are truly remarkable; I need to look at Miura with new respect.

Then came the cycle of one person speaking, another speaking, and then falling silent. Whenever a conversation broke out from some corner of the classroom, the class monitor would ask them "How is it?" and then the group would shut their mouths. From the beginning until now, I don't know how many times this has been repeated.

"...Is the work of the executive committee members that demanding?"

Yuihama couldn't stand it any longer and asked. Upon hearing this, the class president clearly showed a relieved expression.

"Doing it the normal way isn't too difficult... but in terms of results, the girl might have a lot of trouble."

Hey, you bespectacled guy, did you glance at me? Are you indirectly saying I'm useless in combat? But seeing that he struggled for a moment before saying it, I felt bad for him before I could even get angry. Sorry, bespectacled guy. Here, take a pair of glasses. (Note 21 is from the mobile social game "The Idolmaster: Cinderella Girls," a line spoken by Haruna Kamijou.)

"Um……"

Bin looked at me with a troubled expression.

The class monitor probably interpreted her behavior as hesitation and seized the opportunity to launch a follow-up offensive.

"To be honest, your willingness to take this job would be a huge help to us. You are popular and can unite the class, so I think this job is perfect for you."

"No, I'm not like that..."

Yuihama seemed a little embarrassed. Just then, a cold voice came from behind.

"Huh~ Should Yui accept it?"

"what?"

She turned her head and looked at the girl who had spoken.

As I recall, that person's name was Sagami.

The four-person group, led by Sagami, set up their base some distance away from Yuigahama's group. The Miura group sat at the very back by the window, while the Sagami group sat at the back, facing the aisle.

"But that would be great too! It would be so much fun if good friends organized an event together!"

Several of her friends chuckled softly, while Yuihama returned an ambiguous smile.

"Um... actually, it's not like that."

Upon hearing Yuihama's words, Sagami gave me a meaningful look.

That malicious smile was utterly hideous; her whispered conversations with the girls around her were increasingly grating.

I couldn't possibly be unaware that something was hidden in her smile.

During the summer vacation, when I attended a fireworks display with Bin, I was treated with that kind of smile.

Yuihama always stayed within the circle, while I always remained outside, witnessing the mockery that was a mixture of curiosity and contempt.

A soft laugh rippled through my ears.

"I'm saying~"

At that moment, another voice, which could be described as arrogant, interrupted the commotion in the classroom.

She stepped into the grass as if she were doing something bold, instantly silencing the chirping insects.

"Yui has to help me serve the guests, so she's busy."

Yumiko Miura rejected the vote as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Under her decisive action, the arrogance of the Sagami group subsided, and they were speechless as if their throats were blocked.

However, Sagami still had a smile on his face.

"I see~ It's important to take good care of guests too~"

"No, that's right! Greeting guests is also important—wait, I'm in charge of greeting guests? When was that decided?"

Yuihama was only halfway through agreeing when she realized what that sentence meant, and she was quite startled. Hey, the only job decided so far is the boys' school festival executive committee…

Even someone like Miura felt a little flustered upon hearing Yuihama's reaction.

"Huh...you, you're not coming with me? Is...is something wrong? Am I being too impatient...?"

"Yumiko, don't worry, don't worry~ You're absolutely right, that's just how you are."

Ebina stuck out his tongue, winked at Miura, and gave him a thumbs up. Yes, that's right, that's definitely Miura's style.

"Hey, don't compliment me like that, it makes me shy!"

Miura blushed and patted Ebina. Although it was a bit embarrassing to say that to her, I don't think she was praising you.

Yuihama, standing to the side, slumped her shoulders slightly in disappointment.

"I don't have the power to decide..."

I can't believe she's only realizing this now. But don't worry, look at me, I didn't even have a choice. Not only was Hiratsuka-sensei assigning me a job without my consent, but it's a job nobody wants. I really am an unwanted child.