My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 577

The woodworker walked over to my side.

I pointed to the ground.

"Can you see those three girls?"

"Um."

"In fifteen seconds, those three people's underwear will be completely exposed."

"What nonsense are you talking about?"

Zaimokuza shook his head dumbfounded and said, "In this day and age, even in anime that flops, lucky pervert incidents don't happen so easily. Hachiman, have you gone mad because you hate women so much? Is that why you—"

Just then, a gust of wind blew up.

The wind howled past, shaking the school buildings. The curtains behind me were even blown up to the ceiling.

Screams started.

"Wow--!"

"What's going on here?"

"Ugh~"

The three people on the ground held down their skirts, which were about to be blown up by the wind.

I rubbed my eyes, which were watering from the wind.

"Even though I just said I was completely seen... you can't see anything from up there."

I felt ridiculous and couldn't help but laugh.

Looking at the timber stand, his eyes, hidden behind square glasses, widened in surprise.

"Wind, the Successor of Wind, the Mischievous Wind Spirit"Chapter Two"...So you're an ability user too..."

"also?"

"You summoned that gust of wind just now, didn't you?"

"How could that be? It's just a prediction. I collected a lot of data on wind direction after the tennis matches in May. I calculated which direction and what kind of wind would blow during lunch break and after school."

"I see... In that case..."

Timberman ran to the blackboard, picked up the chalk, and started writing something. "As long as we have this ability… heh, very good… the opportunity for revenge is in our hands!"

What on earth is this guy muttering about? I stood behind him.

The blackboard was covered with a jumble of arrows, mysterious stick figures, and equally mysterious equations.

"Hachiman, use your power to make Yuigahama and Yukinoshita cry and beg for mercy."

"What are you talking about?"

Listen carefully—

Timber tapped the blackboard with chalk. "First, you call them both to the right place, then wait for that moment to come. That way, the wind will blow their skirts up, revealing their panties, and we'll be secretly chuckling."

"Um……"

I collect wind direction data purely out of curiosity. It's absolutely not because I have any ill intentions, like wanting to see anyone exposed.

"So, Hachiman, shall we proceed with this plan?"

"Um……"

I looked out the window again. White clouds drifted in the wind high in the sky.

Clouds are wonderful. You can go anywhere by the power of the wind without having to work.

Humans used to utilize wind power, for example, in windmills or sailboats. After the Industrial Revolution, they began to rely on various fuels and stopped using wind power.

Revolution has its advantages and disadvantages. It certainly makes life more convenient, but it also pollutes the environment and severs our connection with nature.

At this moment, shouldn't humanity join hands with nature and establish a new relationship? Indeed, for example, by using the power of the wind to blow up a woman's skirt—

"The Yawata Revolution! The curtain rises!"

I reach out my hand to lead humanity to a new stage.

"Ha, that's exactly what I was waiting for you to say."

The wood carrier gripped my hand tightly with his chalk-dust-covered hands.

—This incident was later known as the "Soubu High School Incident.""The oath".

The next day after school, I met up with Cai Muzu behind the bicycle parking lot.

This place is very close to where I usually have lunch, and it's where I spend a lot of time, so the wind direction data is very complete.

The bicycle parking lot had a metal plate that reached waist height, and Cai Muzuo and I squatted down and hid behind it.

"So, Hachiman, do you want to call Yuihama or Yukinoshita out?"

"Before that—"

I picked up my schoolbag from the ground. "I want to do an experiment."

Upon seeing what I took out, the woodcutter exclaimed in surprise.

"Th-th-that...isn't that a skirt?!"

The skirt I have is a pleated skirt with white stitching sewn onto the hem.

The timber support was dumbfounded.

"Could it be that you stole it—"

"No, I borrowed it from my sister."

It was supposed to be a loan, but of course I didn't ask for her permission. If my dad found out, he'd probably disown me. He might even force me to become a monk. "Hachiman" sounds like a perfect Buddhist name; other monks would say things like, "This guy's name is Hachiman." One day I'll be independent and open my own Hachiman Temple. I'll also open a chain and start a temple craze.

"Does it mean actually wearing that dress and letting the wind blow it around? It's quite scientific to repeatedly verify this. But... who's going to wear it? I don't want to."

"Both the dress and my eyes will be tainted, so I won't let you wear it."

"So who should it be...?"

"The person just arrived."

I stood up slightly and waved across the bicycle parking area. A student who was looking around spotted us and jogged over. (←So cute!)

"Hachiman, so this is you. I've been looking for you for so long." (←Look how cute he is!)

Totsuka Saika (←what a cute name!) came to the back of the bicycle parking lot and smiled at me. (←She has already reached the level of a master)

I've been staring at Zaimokuza's face since yesterday, so Totsuka's cuteness moves me even more than usual. It's gotten this bad in just one day. If I were to become a monk and still look at his cuteness directly, I'd have to abandon Buddhism and start a Totsuka religion. One of the world's three major religions… worthy of being my rival.

"Ah, Zaimokuza-kun is here too."

"Oh, oh, it's Mr. Totsuka. Hmm, so that's how it is."

The lumberjack, who had been called over, gave me a wicked, lewd wink. It was truly disgusting.

No, wait... I can't see it myself, what if I have this expression in front of Totsuka too? Please don't...

The wooden base is like a mirror reflecting myself. If I were a witch, I would throw this mirror deep into the forest before Snow White.

I deliberately put on a serious expression.

"Excuse me for calling you out before the club activity."

"No, don't mention it."

Totsuka gave a slightly shy smile.

"Thank you for coming."

"Um."

"Thank you. Thank you."

"Uh-huh……"

"Thanks."

"Really, you don't need to be so polite?"

Totsuka was at a loss, but truly thanked God. In my popularity rankings, Totsuka holds all ten spots from first to tenth. That's because I cast ten thousand votes of gratitude every day.

"So, what do you want from me?"

"Yes, that's it—"

I took out my sister's dress. "Please! Don't ask any questions, just put it on!"

"Huh?"

Totsuka was clearly confused.

Okay, that's a normal reaction.

"Mr. Totsuka! This is for science! For science!"

Timber's gaze was unusually sharp. Why was this guy even more excited than me?

"But……"

Totsuka doesn't seem to be able to accept it yet.

"Okay, I got it. I'll take mine off too!"

"also?"

In front of a completely bewildered Totsuka, I took off my white shirt and trousers, leaving me only in my underwear.

"Hachiman... he's amazing..."

Totsuka's gaze lingered on my lower body. "Your underwear is so flashy!"

"Right?"

For some reason, I always seem to lose control when buying underwear and end up choosing the most flashy ones. Men's underwear has a really three-dimensional look, it's super cool. And they come in various materials and functionalities.

In this respect, women's underwear has absolutely no appeal; it's just a crumpled lump of fabric, and lace only gets in the way. Men's underwear is definitely the best. (This is to say, Totsuka doesn't know what kind of underwear to wear.)

"Your underwear has lots of stars on it, it looks really cool."

The wooden base seems to be part of the men's underwear camp.

"This is the trendiest part."

"I should have a high status in the Demon Realm."

"Yes. I decide what we'll have for dinner!"

When I was having a long talk with Zaimokuza about underwear, Totsuka still looked troubled.

"Wearing a skirt is a bit... because I'm a boy, you know?"

That's a very apt statement.

But I can't back down here. After all, it concerns how Totsuka looks in a skirt.

"What are you talking about? Wearing women's clothing is a truly masculine act that only men are qualified to do!"

Since Totsuka is so fixated on masculinity, I'll use masculinity to persuade him!

If only I could have argued like that in the clubroom yesterday instead of running away in a panic. "You say Chiba-kun isn't lecherous? Then come and see my Chiba-kun. (Takes off his clothes)"... I think the best outcome would be dropping out of school. The worst outcome would be being looked down upon by Yukinoshita with the cold indifference of "That's Chiba-kun? He's just Nakanoshima at best," and then running off to jump into the sea from the Nakanoshima Bridge because I'm so heartbroken.

By the way, to use Chiba-kun as an analogy, Nakanoshima is a small island located near the crotch, and it's an excellent place to collect seashells. You can get to the island via Nakanoshima Bridge, the highest skybridge in Japan, but this bridge is designated as a "romantic spot for lovers," so I don't recommend it at all.

"Wearing women's clothes makes one look masculine...is that so...?"

Totsuka placed his hands on his chest, looked at the ground, and seemed quite shaken. My heart was also wavering, but that didn't matter.

We should give him another push.

I grabbed Totsuka's shoulder.

"I can only ask you for this. You, the one with whom I'm bound by male friendship."

The atmosphere at the scene made me accidentally utter the phrase "male friendship".

We stared at each other at very close range, and soon Totsuka's cheeks flushed a light red.

"Since Hachiman has said so, then okay..."