My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 579

We crouched behind the bicycle parking lot, waiting for our chance.

"Hey, what exactly do we need to do?"

Faced with Totsuka's doubts—

"You don't need to know. And stay with me..."

I cleverly fooled them.

Shortly afterward, Yuihama arrived at the location I had designated.

She glanced around, then took out a mirror. She fiddled with her bright brown hair and adjusted her shirt collar, which seemed a little too open—spending five minutes tidying herself.

The wood support whispered in my ear:

"She's so serious."

"I guess all girls are like that. My sister takes that long every morning too."

Hearing our conversation, Totsuka chuckled softly.

"I think it depends on who she's meeting."

"Object?"

The timber stand pointed at me. "The object is this man."

"Yes, it's me."

"It's because it's you."

Totsuka gazed at Yuihama with a smile.

What does that mean? Totsuka is truly a mystery of the universe.

The dates recorded in the documents are gradually approaching.

I turned on my phone's clock and started the countdown.

"It's starting... five... four... three... two... one... now!"

However... there was no wind...!

The sound of tennis balls hitting the shuttlecock reached my ears. There wasn't a breath of wind, the skirt didn't move an inch, and of course, the underwear was nowhere to be seen; the struggle hadn't disappeared from the world today either.

"Impossible... How could this happen..."

I'm outraged by this unreasonable world, constantly comparing data and dates. There should be strong winds at this time.

"Could it be...?"

I couldn't help but rush out from behind the bicycle parking lot. Behind me, I heard Zaimokuza shouting, "Hachiman, come back!" but I was already sprinting at full speed.

Yuihama, who was doing a mysterious exercise, noticed me while I was standing on tiptoe, raising and lowering my heels.

"Hey autistic guy, hello—uh, why aren't you wearing any clothes?!"

She stared wide-eyed, and I stood next to her, looking around.

"Oh no, this is terrible—!"

Ahead of me was a group of culprits who had disrupted my plans.

"Hello everyone! The twenty members of the Jingcheng Industrial High School Judo Club have arrived!"

"Excuse me, thirty members of the Kominato Academy High School Judo Club!"

"Welcome! This is the practice room!"

The group of burly men passed by. I think I've seen the man who led them, the one who looked like a sweet potato, before, but he was too far away to see clearly.

The wind didn't pick up as the data suggested, all because of that group of people. The wind was absorbed by their overwhelming masculine hormones.

Winds blow from areas of high pressure to areas of low pressure, and also from areas with higher levels of male hormones. The northward movement of typhoons each year is attributed to the fact that people in Hokkaido consume large amounts of Genghis Khan-style roasted lamb (Note 5) day and night, causing their bodies to secrete male hormones that attract typhoons. One theory suggests that the so-called "divine wind" during the Mongol invasions of Japan was also caused by the male hormones emitted by the Mongol army.

The judo club, this unexpected element, ruined my plans. The judo club is really annoying... I never want to have anything to do with them again.

"Hey, you autistic guy, what are you doing? And you're not even dressed."

Yuihama walked over with a heavy heart.

Oh no... I need to come up with a reason to lie to her.

Not only did I not cover my body, but I also spread my arms and puffed out my chest, deliberately showing it off to her.

"Actually... I'm doing the currently popular male hormone beauty treatment."

"What is that thing?!"

What do you think it is? That's what I was just about to ask.

"It's... a dream beauty method that exposes you to male hormones in the air, resulting in smooth skin, drastically reduced body fat, better eating and sleeping, protection from evil spirits, and instant wealth. That's why I called you out here.

"Oh~"

Yuihama approached me. "Your skin is really nice."

Touch my chest.

"Uh...!"

The icy touch of my fingers made me cry out involuntarily.

"It's so smooth!"

Yuihama's hand stroked downwards, then moved upwards.

"Ah, ah, ah..."

A tingling sensation spread through my body.

Then a huge wave rose up, and I rode it to a higher place.

"Aa ...

Hachiman Hikigaya, let's explode and mix! (Note 6) The End

"Autistic guy, are you okay?"

Yui patted me on the shoulder, and I was resurrected on the ground.

"Phew... It seems that excessive intake of male hormones can cause people to behave abnormally."

"Then this beauty method is completely unusable."

she said with a smile.

Up close, her skin is amazing. I'm so jealous! The recent rebound caused a rapid increase in my female hormones, and I'm grinding my teeth with envy.

"Um, that autistic guy, the one you mentioned on the phone earlier..."

Yuihama poked and prodded her chest with her fingers.

"About what happened yesterday?"

"I think I went too far with you yesterday. It's not like looking at Chiba-kun that way will cause any harm."

"Oh, so that's what you were going to talk about."

I scratched my head. "It doesn't matter anymore."

"Yeah?"

"Because Chiba-kun is the official mascot of Chiba Prefecture, and I'm just an ordinary high school student. It's just not a good match for him."

"You're so serious?!"

"And now I have someone else in my heart."

"Oh, I see..."

Yuihama put her hands behind her back. "By the way, what kind of person is that?"

"Let me think... The reason I noticed him was when he played tennis with me. He was always by my side, and he would laugh at me when I did something silly. Even when I was naked like this."

Upon hearing my answer, Yuihama immediately blushed.

"Probably... probably, that person must also be interested in you."

"Yeah?"

Huh, does Totsuka like me? Hooray!

"Then hurry up and come out naked to meet us."

"Huh?!"

Yuihama exclaimed loudly, "Isn't this...too rushed?"

"why?"

"Because we're still just high school students."

"Can't high school students do it? It's okay, right?"

Is there a rule that high school students can't go to the Super Bathhouse...? It's open in the morning, so going now isn't too rushed.

Has Yuigahama never been to the Super Bath? That's why she had this strange misunderstanding. Meet with Totsuka Tanuki to build rapport, and maybe invite him along too.

"Hey, are you free for a bit?"

As soon as I asked, Yuihama let out an even louder "Eh-eh⁉" exclamation.

"If you have time, come with me—"

"No, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait! No, no, this can't be happening!"

She waved her hand forcefully, then turned and ran away.

What's wrong with that guy...? Would a normal person be so averse to a supermodel? Or does she have a huge tattoo on her back?

I went back to the back of the bicycle parking lot.

"Yui-hama seems emotionally unstable. She suddenly screamed very loudly, it was a bit scary."

"Women's hearts and otaku's ultimate desires are synonymous with fickleness."

The wood stand said smugly.

"In my opinion, Hachiman's emotions are quite unstable as well."

Totsuka wore a complicated expression.

Let's leave that aside for now. That leaves only Yukinoshita as a target. Can I possibly win over that impenetrable skirt? Judging from her usual perfect superhuman demeanor, just touching her skirt would probably break two or three fingers. How terrifying.

Their family seems to be a clan that has truly inherited "abilities" and "destiny" from ancient times.

In short, I decided to contact her first. I got her phone number through Totsuka.

"Hello--"

"Oh, Hachiman, what a coincidence. I have something I'd like to ask you."

“Eh…?”

Could it be that she discovered I was investigating "the Clan"...? I... I don't know anything! Someone told me they'd give me ten dollars for calling this number...

"Yuigahama-san is acting strangely. Do you know why? She suddenly left the clubroom, muttering 'I'm doomed, I'm doomed,' and ran back, then grabbed her schoolbag and went home."

I... I really don't know anything! I swear to the Virgin Mary—hmm? I know...

"It's probably some kind of hormonal imbalance."

"This is really worrying. Should we recommend a doctor to her?"

"A shower and a good night's sleep should make you feel better."

"Then let's observe until tomorrow."

It seems that Yuihama's matter has been barely covered up.

"I called to ask if it would be convenient for you to come over?"

There was a brief silence. I could sense her impatience over the phone.

"You're so old-fashioned. You actually called her out after school to confess your feelings."

"No, that's not it. There's something more important."