My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 646

"No, no, it's always been empty..."

Junjun looked utterly perplexed. Xiaoliu, on the other hand, was blushing as red as a tomato due to anger and shame. However, her face was so red that her veins were practically bulging—she might kill someone…

"There really is someone sitting here! Absolutely! My butt felt soft! Ah, come to think of it, I think I sat on something hard! Probably! Definitely! Surely! It was definitely someone touching me for lewd purposes! That guy is a pervert—!"

Are you Prajna?

Witnessing firsthand how suspicion gradually turned into a wrongful conviction terrified me. And this was the route I believed to be true. It was awful. I know all too well that being mistaken for a pervert on a train is a terrible experience. Daiji is really in deep trouble!

By the way, the hard thing she sat on was a belt buckle. I don't think she'd believe that. My maxed-out stealth skill saved my life.

"Xiao Liu, calm down... There's no one else here... Oh, right, I thought of an even better restaurant... Shall we go there? No, I mean, I want to go to that restaurant. It's not that I'm worried about your hemorrhoids. Hemorrhoids are a misunderstanding, right? I believe you... Anyway, let's go to a gentler restaurant. I want you to be the gentle Xiao Liu you always are..."

Wow, Junjun is awesome. Being a couple is really tough. Only people who can do *that* kind of thing can get a girlfriend, right? I really have no choice but to make arranged marriage my goal.

...I just don't feel like eating ramen anymore. Being ignored by the staff is also hurtful. I'll go get a haircut first.

I was walking down the street, thinking I'd just pick any shop to get a haircut, when I felt a strong sense of unease.

...No one else was flashing their lights at me when they were walking?

People usually avoid me. This tendency is even stronger among young women. As for girls younger than me, most of them will veer away from me like a magic ball when they see my face.

I once met a rebellious girl who acted like "I am who I am, adults have nothing to do with me." She swaggered down the street, but as soon as she reached me, she suddenly screamed, scurried to the side of the road, and trembled. Her classmates probably saw her as aloof and unapproachable, but she turned into a fawn when she saw me. Haha, how about that? I am the queen of walking…walking is effortless for me…effortless…wait, what's going on? A sharp pain shot through my chest…

Incidentally, older women are less likely to avoid me. Those over fifty even show me care. Does this mean that when a human's level exceeds fifty, their mental resistance also reaches its maximum?

Getting back to the point, just today, girls on the street didn't avoid me at all. They even brushed past me. How is that possible! I could even sit next to a high school girl on the train. From the perspective of cosmology, is this even possible, Dr. Hawking?!

However, the fact that its presence is so low makes it all the more interesting.

The mischievous spirit is reignited.

Should we do it? It's something someone with maxed-out stealth level should do.

I spotted a mother and daughter ahead of me heading in the same direction.

A young mother and her young daughter. A perfect target. Now, I'm about to do something dangerous that could get me arrested by the police for being too suspicious!

I quickly approached the mother and daughter. From behind, completely unsuspecting. And then... I passed them.

Hey!

Success! ...Overtaking.

The most crisis-aware individuals in Japan are mothers with young daughters. Their awareness is so high that they would call the police even if a man were just standing in the street. The crime of overtaking just now is even more serious. It wouldn't be surprising if several commuters were nearby and were subdued on the spot—it's a sexual crime.

If my stealth skill hadn't been activated, I should have seen the news that "around 1 p.m. today, a young man in Inage Ward, Chiba City, quickly chased after a mother and daughter from behind."

however.

"Mom, it looks like someone just walked past us."

"Nobody's here. Nobody would do something so weird in a place with so many people."

"It really exists..."

Overtaking was definitely viewed as suspicious behavior. Luckily, I have stealth skills.

That said, it seems the child did indeed sense my presence. My skill is probably a form of social stealth—a kind of transparency that eliminates my social presence. Therefore, it's effective against socially integrated individuals, but cannot completely conceal itself from children.

Wow, that's impressive. If I keep practicing this skill, I might one day reach Lupin III's level. But stealing is a crime. If I'm going to steal, I have to steal something that doesn't constitute a crime... which is your heart (cool).

At that moment, someone I recognized appeared about ten meters ahead.

Could that guy be...?

Uh—that frivolous guy in my class, someone I've spoken to a few times, who belongs to Hayama's clique… Hey Nickens, what's your name? I'm the Bomber. (Note 11)

I remember now. It was Sekiguchi, the frivolous guy from the Hayama Group. I was just making this up.

Just kidding, that guy works for the Ministry of Revenue, if I remember correctly...

The Minister of Revenue is walking towards us from the front. Compared to when he was in school, he seems a bit listless. Could it be that he lacks presence? He's just lethargic. Is this a state of not deliberately cultivating an image, what's called a state of being without personality? Meaning, completely lacking pretense, like the way he talks to his mother at home. Even the most cheerful person is in a state of being without personality when talking to their mother at home (except for girls who have a very close relationship with their mothers). Simply put, being without personality is the other person's true personality. The classroom is truly terrifying; no one can show their true nature there.

However, running into him in a place like this is such a coincidence. Given the current situation, we'll probably just brush past each other… Should I say hello? After all, we're not strangers, we're classmates, so it'd be best to say hello, but… well, honestly, it's such a hassle (Note 12). Sekiguchi… no, Tobe is someone I know, but I'm not familiar with him at all. If I had to describe him, we're more than strangers but not quite friends. We can probably just ignore each other, right? He probably thinks the same way, right? We can both enjoy a relaxed and gentle world together, right?

...No, I couldn't ignore him coming from the front. He might think I was completely malicious. Oh well, I'd better say hello. I waited for the Minister of Revenue to approach and greeted him in what I thought was the most natural way.

"Hi."

“…………”

My dashing voice called out to Tobe… but no one did! He wouldn't listen! Tobe walked right past me! To ignore me at such close range was too cruel! Cruel—endure—endure (Note 13)! My delicate heart overflowed from its inner wounds like udon noodles! The difficulty was, I couldn't tell if this was due to my stealth skill, or if Tobe was deliberately ignoring me. Wait, I just spoke from my diaphragm! In that case, I'll call out to him to confirm.

"Hello, Ministry of Revenue."

“…Huh?”

I called out to him, and the Minister of Revenue looked around. His gaze passed right past my face. He hadn't noticed me either. It was definitely the effect of the skill.

I left my classmate from the Ministry of Revenue, who was looking around anxiously, and departed. This skill is a passive skill; I cannot control it by my own will.

It's so powerful that I'm starting to wonder if it could actually be used for evil. That being said, as a commoner, I can't think of any bad things I could do with it; it's such a waste. Giving the demon a cypress club, giving Benkei a bamboo spear... wait, the demon and Benkei would probably be quite strong with those weapons too…

In short, even if I run into someone I know, they won't notice me, so it seems I can save myself the trouble and time of hiding.

Hmm, that's strange. I'm clearly using my skills to go all out, but I'm not happy at all... Every time I activate my stealth skill, it leaves scars in my heart. When will my healing ability awaken?

Forget it... I'll just find a random shop to get a haircut, grab some ramen, and then go home. Back to my warm room where nothing can hurt me...

After walking around for a while, I spotted a trendy beauty salon. You could tell just by looking at it. It's probably a hair salon that young women love. If that's the case, young men with a keen eye for beauty would likely adore it too. The price list even says men are welcome. But I was hesitant about going in. It seemed a bit too high-end for me, and sometimes these kinds of places even require appointments.

Besides, I once walked into a beauty salon and was kicked out by the staff with, "Oh, I'm sorry, I don't think your style suits us. Would you like to try another salon?" It left me traumatized. Madam, did you hear that? He was talking about style! You're supposed to be a trendy hair salon; please think carefully about your words when you're kicking out customers.

So, I didn't go to that store. As I passed by the store, someone I knew opened the door and came out.

"Thank you—☆I'll come again—☆"

The girl thanking the shop assistant who saw her off was none other than Yui Yuigahama. She looked even more radiant than usual, perhaps because she had just gotten her hair done. What's with that "girl effect"? Is it like the scene from a shoujo anime where the popular upperclassman makes his appearance? Even the end of her sentences has a flashing star—this high school girl is too dazzling! Don't get too cocky, okay?

Although I'm used to meeting her in the clubroom, it's still quite awkward to run into someone I know outside. We've known each other for so long, it's not that I'm embarrassed or bothered, but it does cause mental fatigue. However, now I have a skill. I've decided to use my stealth skill to walk over there.

Hey!

...Okay, stealth successful.

I walked past Yui-hama as if nothing had happened. Yui-hama didn't notice me. At this distance, she would usually be easily spotted. But don't worry, Yui-hama. It's not that you're heartless. It's just that I'm too good at it.

Just as I walked ten meters and changed my mood to continue searching for the barbershop.

"An autistic man?"

My bangs were brushed aside like a curtain, and Yui's face suddenly peeked out and asked, "Is anyone home?☆". My private space was seriously violated, and I was terrified.

"Aa ...

"Wow, that scared me to death... Don't scream like a girl—☆"

It's normal to be scared, okay? This is called a surprise attack. Normally, we'd just go straight into battle. Never forget Pearl Harbor. Never forget my face.

"How...how did you recognize me?"

"You just walked past me☆ But you seemed different than usual; for a moment I thought it was someone else."

"You didn't just brush my bangs aside and say hello to me, did you? If it were a stranger, they might be so embarrassed they'd die."

"Hmm...maybe. Ugh, just thinking about it makes me so embarrassed—☆"

Yuihama seemed not to have considered this possibility and shyly covered her head.

...People like this aren't afraid of making a fool of themselves or failing.

That's why she casually strikes up conversations with strangers, trying to build rapport. There might be times of failure, but she perseveres, and eventually her circle of friends expands. To put it another way, it's like a hit-and-run tactic in interpersonal relationships. No, not run… not distance yourself, but actively embrace the other person, so it should be called a hit-and-hook. Incidentally, the social strategy of marginalized individuals is like a bear waiting to be approached. The sudden use of shogi terminology also fits the style of marginalized individuals.

"But just like I guessed, it really is you, then there's no problem☆"

"Oh, you went to get a haircut? You look absolutely radiant."

"Huh... Can you tell? I just went to get it fixed today, and you noticed! ☆ Uh, you saw me walk out of the shop just now, right!"

Her shy expression instantly turned into a look of disillusionment. By disillusionment, I mean that cartoonish face where the eyes turn into Xs. It's like saying, "Why did you suddenly give me that innocent 'You figured it out! I'm so happy!' look?" I, who made that joke, didn't know how to react.

"So what are you doing now?"

She was slightly less excited. That annoying ☆ had also disappeared. Was it related to her mental state?

"Um, I want to get a haircut. My hair is too long, and it seems to have changed my image."

"Oh, yeah. I thought your hair was really long before the holiday, and it's even longer today. It's awful."

"Hey, what do you mean by 'pretty bad'? How bad can hair get if it grows a little longer?"

"...Uh, well, getting arrested by the police, or something like that?"

"Arrested by the police?!"

Am I really that miserable right now? Ugh, this must be a lie.

"Ah, it's not like I'll be arrested immediately... but, well, I have a feeling I might do something bad. Like, a bomb?"

What I said to you was practically slander.

"Huh? What do you mean? Is it rude to the Bomber?"

On the contrary, it was discrimination against me. A shocking statement. Because in Yuihama's mind, my status is even lower than that of the Bomber, which is why she could say those words.

She seemed to realize it herself, exclaimed "Ah!", and hurriedly began to explain.

No.

"Isn't it?"

"I really didn't mean that... it just went a little too far..."

That's even more hurtful. You've already realized how rude you were on your own, so pay attention to the last point.

"Absolutely...I absolutely have to get a haircut! I'll never let anyone say I'm over the line again!"

I exuded confidence and made up my mind.

"Oh, how about we go to that hair salon we just visited? Let me recommend it to you. It was featured in magazines and on TV recently, and it's really popular among girls now. They even have coupons."

"Ugh, no, I don't want to go to those trendy stores. I want to go somewhere more casual..."

"I think every beauty salon is like that."

"Occasionally there are some stores that feel a bit off."

"Don't go to shops that seem a bit off. You might end up with a weird haircut."

"At this point, I don't care how well it was cut."

"Huh, why...? I don't understand. I'll just find a decent hair salon."

"No normal, good salon would want to cut the hair of a bomb-wielding man."

"No way! You seem to have misunderstood again. It's work, so they'll cut it properly. Stop dawdling, let's go! Oh, and I'll help you tell the stylist your requirements!"

Yuihama smiled, probably quite pleased with the idea.

I'm utterly exhausted. My mental fatigue level has reached MAX (not the MAX of coffee). I can now unleash my ultimate attack by consuming the meter!

I really don't want to be a non-mainstream customer. I just want to get into the shop quickly, get a haircut quickly, and go home quickly. Even this small thing is difficult; it seems the modern society I live in is wrong. Do I really have to correct this society myself? Haha, will having such twisted thoughts turn me into a bomb-monster...?

"...Please, have mercy on me. I really can't stand that kind of shop. The shopkeepers hate customers like me, and I just can't walk in without a care in the world."

"No way..."

"You really think they won't? Do you think they'll welcome men outside their designated area?"

Yuihama was speechless for a moment. Her silence was the answer. Even Yuihama, who knew me and was kind-hearted by nature, hesitated; most people would have been more honest in expressing their disgust.

"That's it. Knowing my own limitations, I'll go to a store that's more suitable for me."

"An autistic man..."

Yuihama's eyes welled up with tears. But she immediately broke into a radiant smile. Too radiant. Are you a third wheel?

"Oh, right! I have a great idea, how about I cut it for you?"

"……What?"

I meant no harm, but usually what Yuihama says is mostly predictable—common opinions, nice things, and so on. But this, I feel like it's a completely unexpected suggestion from another dimension.

"You're going to cut my hair? Seriously? Do you even know how to cut hair?"

"Of course, it's impossible to get a very formal haircut, but I often see barbers cutting men's hair at the salon, so they can still do a trim."