My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

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"Isn't it nice to do this once in a while?"

"That's what Hiratsuka-sensei said gently beside me," she said, lightly placing her hand on my shoulder. Well, it's nice to do it once in a while. Oh, and remember to send the photos to Totsuka afterwards.

Click—the sound of a camera shutter echoed in the home economics classroom at sunset.

× × ×

It was a late Friday night after the final showdown of the brides.

After dinner, my parents went to bed early, leaving only Komachi and me in the living room.

Komachi was washing dishes in the kitchen, while I nestled on the sofa, the clatter of the dishes accompanying my work as I frantically worked on my laptop. I'd almost completely forgotten about my magazine column; thankfully, tomorrow's a holiday.

I don't need to go to school today, so I can work late into the night and focus on finishing the manuscript.

I've heard that mammals are naturally nocturnal. I'm a mammal myself, no wonder I only get energetic at night. Honestly, I really want to nurse too.

I stared at the completely blank page, pondering how to begin. The deadline was fast approaching. Hmm? You're asking what I've been doing the past few days? No, you misunderstood—I've just been completely lacking inspiration! You know that feeling? Or do you not know (Note 10: The original text here is "わかるかなㄧ？わかんねㄧだろなㄧ？", a famous stand-up comedy routine by Matsutsuru-ya Chitose)? Actually, I'm not sure myself. Okay, whatever, I just need to finish this column quickly!

I typed a few words and they disappeared, then I typed a few more and they disappeared again. After repeating this process countless times, my creative ideas were almost exhausted. Every now and then, I would stop typing and rack my brains for content and rhetoric. In the end, I couldn't resist the urge to play "Kantai Collection" (Note 11: a web game developed by Kadokawa Games and provided and operated by DMM.com). I ended up spending more time playing it than doing anything else.

Is this the end for today...?

Just as I was about to give up, my phone, which was on the dining table some distance away, vibrated, informing me that someone was calling. Unfortunately, I didn't have the energy to answer the call, so I simply ignored it.

At that moment, Komachi turned off the tap, dried her hands with a towel, and walked out of the kitchen. On the way, she casually picked up her phone and tossed it over.

"Brother, the phone!"

"Okay." I answered and took the phone.

Okay, since Komachi has already helped me get the phone, I have no reason not to answer it.

The caller ID on my phone screen was Yui Hama, and her purpose for calling was obvious. I answered the call while holding the phone to my shoulder, continuing to type on the keyboard.

"Hello?"

"Oh, have you finished writing your column yet?"

As expected, Yuigahama was calling to urge me to finish the manuscript. If I had finished writing it, I would have sent the file out already...

"Writing a column isn't that easy. Have you finished your part yet?"

"Yes, I'm in charge of the illustrations, and Yukino will handle the compilation. Now we just need you to write the column and it will be finished."

Yuihama drew the illustrations, and Yukinoshita did the layout—this division of labor truly allows everyone to utilize their strengths.

That said, hearing that I'm the only one who hasn't submitted my manuscript yet makes me feel an immense pressure, which will only make me procrastinate even more...

Feeling guilty towards the two of them, I fell silent. During this brief silence, a faint voice came through the receiver.

"Has he finished writing it?"

That voice sounds a lot like Yukinoshita. Could it be that Yui is spending the night at her house tonight? Those two are really close.

"Huh, what did you say... Oh, okay. She asked if you've finished writing?"

Yuihama's voice was still very clear. It seemed that her microphone could pick up even the voices under the snow in the distance.

"not yet."

He said not yet... um, I'll ask him.

Yuihama was talking to Yukinoshita, so there was a slight delay before I heard her reply.

She asked you when you could finish.

"I don't know either... Also, don't you think it's troublesome to pass on messages like this?"

Playing the telephone game at a time like this would be pointless.

Then, I vaguely heard their conversation: "Can I listen instead?" "Oh, okay."

"Hello?"

"Um."

Now it's Yukino's turn to answer the phone. Thinking about it, this might be the first time I've spoken to her on the phone. Yukino went straight to the point:

When will you finish?

Her voice was as cold as ever, and I found myself stammering. Even on the phone, Yukinoshita still possessed an unyielding authority.

"This, this week..."

Feeling guilty for being the only one lagging behind, I answered somewhat hesitantly. The next second, a soft sigh came through the receiver.

"Today is Friday. Can I interpret 'this week' as today? Do you know when the deadline is?"

"Star, Monday..."

"Yes, next Monday. I'll leave your column section blank for now and continue with the rest of the work. Send it to me as soon as you're done."

"Okay. Then it needs to be sent to—"

That's all for now.

Before I could finish speaking, Yukinoshita hung up the phone, leaving only the electronic beeping sound echoing in my ears. I looked at my phone and muttered:

"If you don't tell me your email address, where am I supposed to send it...?"

It seems that no matter how hard I try, I'll have to wait until next Monday to submit my manuscript. Oh well! I didn't want this either—it's all because Yukino didn't listen to me properly; she's just as bad as me for not submitting my manuscript by the deadline.

After finally getting rid of the calls urging me to finish my manuscript, I felt much more relaxed. I breathed a sigh of relief, tossed my phone aside, and stretched my shoulders a bit.

However, I didn't get much time, so it's best to resolve this troublesome matter as soon as possible.

I continued to work diligently on my column, when suddenly someone handed me a coffee.

Looking up, I saw it was Komachi. She was standing next to me, holding two cups.

I gratefully accepted the coffee, and Komachi sat down beside me. It seemed she wasn't planning on sleeping and intended to stay there.

"You don't need to wait for me."

After all, I don't know when this manuscript will be finished; it might even take all night. Komachi listened and gently shook her head, saying:

"It's okay, Komachi wants to wait and read her brother's column."

"...Whatever you want."

Okay, since tomorrow is a holiday, it shouldn't be a problem to stay up a little late tonight.

I took a sip of coffee and continued typing.

If you're alone, it's easy to gradually slack off; but if there are people waiting for you, you can only obediently work hard.

In order to finish the column as quickly as possible, I stuffed a bunch of meaningless sentences into the articles to pad the word count. As time went by, it eventually accumulated to a considerable length.

In the stillness of the night, the clicking of the keyboard continued incessantly. Apart from that, only the occasional dripping of water droplets into the sink could be heard.

After an unknown amount of time, the silence was broken by faint breathing sounds.

I've almost finished writing and am about to reach the end. I turn to look at my side and see that Komachi is already too tired to stay awake and has started to doze off.

Her head rested on my shoulder, a sweet burden. For a moment, I closed my eyes as well.

However, it only lasted for a fleeting moment.

I slowed down, carefully avoiding waking Komachi, and typed the last words that came to mind:

Whether it's marriage or the future, we can't know how things will turn out.

Even with thorough preparation, new troubles will still arise; this is the way of the world.

However, everyone still has the right to desire happiness.

We must not slack off in our efforts to prepare for that moment.

Conclusion: Women everywhere should immediately seek out men who are determined to be stay-at-home husbands and have promising futures.

Volume 7.5 SS2 Short Story ② Needless to say, Hachiman Hikigaya's gentleness is quite twisted.

As autumn deepens, the leaves begin to change color. The seasons are slowly changing, and recently, the ministry society I belong to has also undergone some changes.

"Chiba-dori's Troubleshooting Email"

Yuihama, who was leading the chants, seemed excited about something. She then clapped her hands to liven up the atmosphere, but Yukinoshita and I looked at each other coldly.

The recent small change in our club is an activity that Hiratsuka-sensei added on a whim—answering letters of concern from all over the world.

Yuihama, still excited, began reading the first letter of the day.

"First, there's a friend from Chiba City who goes by the pen name 'I'm Anxious'."

Doesn't this person know what a "pen name" means? No matter how you look at it, his pen name should be the subject line of his letters. I bet he's the kind of person who sees a sign in the instruction manual saying "Please read this instruction manual carefully" but still won't bother to read it. Hmph, someone who can't even follow the rules shouldn't expect us to answer their questions! Sigh, he has absolutely no motivation…

The Troubles of the Pen Name "I'm Very Anxious"

"The senior members of the tennis club have completely stepped down from their frontline roles, and I'm taking over as president. How can I lead everyone forward? Please let me know if there are any things I should be aware of. Thank you for your help."

...Oh, I see. So this person adorably and accidentally typed the title in the pen name field. Seriously, to make such a cute little mistake, he must have felt incredibly uneasy and adorable.

"Okay, I'll answer seriously!"

Why do you suddenly seem so energetic...?

Ignoring Yuihama's surprise and helplessness, I quickly began to think of a solution.

"So, firstly, what's your opinion, Yukinoshita, who also serves as the company president?"

"Hmm... if you don't mind me sharing my personal opinion..."

Previously, Yukinoshita, who had been engrossed in reading and seemingly indifferent, closed her book and began to think when her name was called.

"To dominate the masses, one must begin by demonstrating superiority over others. Once in a high position, one must begin to suppress and denounce dissidents in order to eliminate those who oppose one's cause. If one can achieve this, one should be able to maintain a short-term regime for about a year."

It was terrifying that she said those words with a smile on her face...

"Hmm... but I don't know how it will actually turn out. Although the word 'leadership' sounds nice, if you go too far, it can also cause people to dislike you."

"Indeed. For example, the president of a certain club not only lacks leadership skills, but is also autocratic, arrogant, and has a low reputation."

"Could you please not look at me when you say that...?"

Yukinoshita's expression turned displeased. She hadn't realized Yukinoshita knew her own personality so well, and perhaps even cared about it... If she cared, why didn't she try to change?

"In short, there are many kinds of leaders. Right?"

Yuihama helped smooth things over and began replying to letters.

"The club president doesn't always have to be at the forefront leading the club; accepting help from members is also a good approach. Also, remember not to run too far ahead, lest those behind can't keep up. Good luck!"

Okay, the first letter is finished. Now, let's have Hibin read the second letter.

"Hmm~ The second letter is... from a friend in Chiba City, using the pen name 'Sword Master General'."

It's that guy again... This makes me happy to think that the trouble counseling segment has a loyal audience. Please stop writing in.

"Recently, there's been a rumor online that anyone who can write Japanese can pass the preliminary round of a light novel newcomer award, but that's a lie. This is based on my experience. Please tell me how to pass the preliminary round, please be as detailed as possible."

After reading the letter, Yukinoshita looked puzzled.

"He should start by correcting the Japanese in this letter..."

"What exactly is this person talking about, Italy?"

Yuihama chimed in with a complaint. But in terms of language skills, I think your level is about the same as his.

"Simply put, what he wants to ask is how to win the newcomer award and officially debut."

After I finished translating, I glanced at Yuihama, hinting that she should offer some advice, but she responded with a reluctant expression.

"Huh? This is supposed to be your responsibility, right? You answer that."

Yukinoshita nodded in agreement.

"Criticism without holding back is also a form of gentleness."

After she finished speaking, her gaze returned to the paperback in her hands.

Hmm... okay. I mentally drafted my reply, pulled my laptop over, and started typing.