My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong As Expected

Page 553

In the end, I still couldn't ignore this person.

Her words, seemingly able to see through people's hearts, her intimidating voice pressed against her throat, her sharp gaze that could freeze anyone, her beautiful face that matched her appearance, her mask of feigned maturity and liveliness, the innocent expression she sometimes revealed, and her gentle smile that was so tender it was heartbreaking—all of these things captivated me.

Although she probably saw right through my thoughts.

Even knowing that she was manipulating him, he still had to ask.

"Why did you say those things? What exactly do you want?"

In an impatient voice, I voiced the question that had been lingering in my heart.

Yukino's words and actions always made me—or rather, us—uneasy. Even at the very moment when things were finally about to come to a peaceful end, she threw stones into it, creating ripples.

We can't let her continue causing trouble.

My words were more barbed than I had imagined, and my tone was more impolite than I had expected.

Yang accepted my glare as if nothing had happened.

"Didn't I say? I don't care, it doesn't matter who it is. I don't care about family matters at all. Whether it's me or Yukino who comes, it doesn't matter."

She said something similar to what she had just said, and I couldn't help but sigh. Yang Nai probably heard her and silently looked out the glass door.

"...I just hope she can convince me completely. Any ending is fine."

This whisper was similar in meaning to the previous words, but it carried a mournful loneliness in its tone.

Here we go again. I'm completely baffled by this person.

She masks malice with kindness, sometimes deliberately playing the villain, unafraid of being hated or loathed, and other times speaking in an extremely gentle voice with a sorrowful expression. If all of this is acting, I can only surrender. There's no escaping her grasp.

"Are you asking them to show you their sincerity? Are you some kind of value-obsessed freak...?"

I sighed deeply, revealing a smile of utter disbelief, indicating my complete incomprehension. Yang Nai seemed quite pleased with my reaction, letting out a soft chuckle.

"I don't deny it... but my mother probably wouldn't be able to accept it either."

"Her reaction was quite positive."

I recalled that gentle smile, and Yang Nai burst out laughing, giving me a disdainful look that said, "What nonsense are you talking about?"

"How could she accept that so easily? That's why she remained noncommittal, which is essentially the same as not answering at all. Yukino herself probably realized it too."

Neither agreeing nor refusing, simply indicating that she understood and postponing the matter—that was pure diplomacy. Yukinoshita probably understood the meaning of that sentence too. Only now do I realize that her stiff smile and tense shoulders stemmed from this very thing.

"...They really are family."

Understanding someone's subtle emotions requires long-term accumulation in daily life. My relationship with Komachi is a good example.

Having known each other for less than a year, it's impossible for them to understand each other that deeply. Moreover, it's simply impossible for her mother and sister to deduce her true intentions from subtle changes in expression, actions, and unspoken meanings.

Therefore, it was inevitable that I didn't notice—just as I was thinking this, Yang saw through my thoughts and laughed it off.

"Even if they're not family, anyone can tell... Even ordinary friends like you can tell, right?"

"I'm not confident that I can call her a friend, so I don't know what to say."

"Even at a time like this, I like it... You really love to make a last-ditch effort."

Although Yang Nai was smiling, her eyes remained cold. As if her mood had been ruined, she sighed in boredom and opened the glass door.

"...No one would be convinced by that."

She left those words behind and went outside.

I followed behind and took a step down the stairs.

But I was still wearing my indoor shoes. I glared at them resentfully and clicked my tongue. Changing shoes was too much trouble, so I simply stepped outside and rushed downstairs.

"Um, why not?"

I caught up with Yang Nai before she went down the last step and asked her. Yang Nai stopped and slowly turned around.

Its large, dark eyes reflected the streetlights, glistening slightly with tears. The way it gazed at me seemed to be weeping.

"...Because her wish was nothing more than a simple act of compensation."

Upon hearing that word, I couldn't help but stagger, reflexively regaining my balance.

Compensation behavior —

This is an act of satisfying one's original desires by achieving other goals when faced with obstacles and unable to reach a certain objective. In other words, it is merely using something false to deceive oneself.

Assuming Yukinoshita Haruno is right, and her wish is merely a stopgap measure to cover something up, how can I possibly agree with her?

Seeing that I was speechless, Yang Nai walked up a step, met my gaze, and said gently in a low voice:

"Yukino, you, and Hihama-chan are all trying hard to convince yourselves, aren't you? You're only getting caught up in words and superficial formalities, instead of facing the reality..."

Shut up, stop talking. I know perfectly well what's going on.

But no matter how much I pleaded, Yang Nai didn't stop. With a pitying look in her eyes, she spoke in a voice that seemed to be comforting me:

"Find a good excuse, find a good reason... try to fool yourself, deceive yourself. Right?"

She continued talking to herself, showing no intention of listening to my reply, yet every word she uttered still reached my ears. Her voice, her breath, her words seeped into my heart like flowing water.

A low murmur, indistinguishable as inhalation or exhalation, lingered deep in the throat, utterly unable to be uttered.

I know in my heart that those who presumptuously talk about "a man's persistence" are actually doing exactly the same thing as before.

No, it's worse than before. I even forced them to accept that colossal lie.

I clenched my teeth so hard they felt like they were about to shatter. Yang Nai gently stroked my cheek, her slender, long fingers sliding lightly as if touching something fragile.

"So, didn't I already say that?"

She smiled faintly, her fingertips sliding down to press against my chest.

"You can't get drunk."

"...It seems that's correct."

Hearing the words I forced out, Yang Nai revealed a smile remarkably similar to hers, her expression twisted with sorrow.

Her fragile smile, as if she might burst into tears at any moment, deeply moved me.

Just before the stage lights were about to dim, I saw her gently waving from the side of the stage through the small window, her fragile smile disappearing into the darkness.

The pain I felt then still torments me to this day.

"If I don't make a real resolution, it will stay bottled up inside and never end. For the past twenty years, I've been deceiving myself like this, so I'm quite aware... I've been living a life of pretense."

The monologue, tinged with regret, was both fragile and illusory; her eyes, gazing into the distance, were moist. Her usual composed and mature demeanor, along with her alluring yet dangerous aura, had vanished without a trace, making her appear even younger than I was.

I feel like this is the first time I've seen Yukino Yukinoshita's true appearance.

Ignoring my confusion, Yang stepped back and turned around.

"Hachiman, do real things really exist...?"

The words, tinged with a hint of loneliness, dissipated in the night wind.

Yang Nai smoothed her disheveled hair with her hands and stepped out, as if chasing after the vanished wind. Reaching the stairs and the school gate, she turned back, a gentle smile on her face, and waved softly.

I could only stand there blankly, watching the beautiful, upright figure walk away, without even the strength to wave back.

After Yang Nai's figure completely disappeared, her legs suddenly went weak.

I sat down on the stairs.

What I hope for is simply Yukino Yukinoshita's sincere choice, sincere decision, and sincere words.

However, if that is merely a compensatory act born of despair, then that answer is ultimately wrong.

What she said was absolutely true. It's just that the premise used to arrive at the answer had already been distorted.

No. It was me, Hachiman Hikigaya, who twisted it.

Knowing full well that there is only one answer, I have been avoiding making a choice, constantly making excuses and delaying the process, using sophistry and deception to impose my twisted lies on others.

Relying on the other person's gentleness and honesty, pretending to be intoxicated by a momentary dream, and insisting that it is the right answer.

It's laughable to even call it a mistake.

It can be said that its very existence diminishes its value; it is a complete counterfeit.

× × ×

As night fell over the school buildings, I ignored the cold wind blowing in my face and sat on the stairs in a daze.

A few cars drove by on the road ahead, and that was about it. School had let out, and I hadn't seen anyone for a while.

I didn't have the strength to stand up and slumped to the ground. After a while, the glass door behind me opened, and loud footsteps came from behind. I reflexively turned my head.

Then, he received a slight impact on his head.

"Hey, don't wear indoor shoes outside."

Looking up, I saw Ms. Hiratsuka holding a hand chop. So the shock I'd just felt came from her.

"It's been a long time since she hit me," I thought, touching my head, an inappropriate thought popping into my head. Ms. Hiratsuka sighed softly and gently extended her raised hand.

"We're locking up now. Go change your shoes."

Staying here isn't a solution. Although I didn't look at the clock, some time must have passed. Urged on by Professor Hiratsuka, I finally stood up and brushed the sand off my coat.

I took two steps at a time and climbed the stairs. Hiratsuka-sensei sighed with her arms crossed, as if she wanted to see if I had obediently gone home.

After going upstairs, I nodded to Mr. Hiratsuka and entered the school building.

The lights in the administrative offices and faculty offices were still on, but the lights in the corridors were almost all off.

Thanks to the outside light and the emergency indicator lights, walking was not a problem, but my steps were still heavy.

In addition, the temperature dropped significantly at night, so I subconsciously hunched my back.

"Hikigaya."

A voice suddenly came from behind.

I turned around, and Ms. Hiratsuka had caught up without making a sound. Upon closer inspection, I noticed she wasn't wearing indoor shoes or slippers, just socks. She was already getting ready to go home, carrying her high heels in her hand.

She was wearing a coat instead of a white robe, gently patted my back, told me to straighten my back, and said with a smile:

"...It's late, I'll take you home."

"No need, I have a bicycle."

"What does it matter? Just leave the bicycle here."

Is this person the yokai Okiyobori (note)? Hiratsuka-sensei ignored me, pushing my back and urging me on. In the end, she walked with me to the front door and half-forced me to the parking lot.

Note: One of the seven mysteries of this place, a monster that can make fishermen leave behind the fish they catch.

The parking lot was empty, except for two or three cars. One of them, an expensive foreign car that seemed out of place on campus, flashed its lights a few times. After unlocking the car with her smart key, Ms. Hiratsuka walked over to her car, cautiously looked around, and then waved to me.

"Get in the car, hurry up."

"oh."

I was urged to sit in the passenger seat and fasten my seatbelt. Professor Hiratsuka also quickly got into the driver's seat and started the car. The deep engine sound began to vibrate in my abdomen.

Hiratsuka-sensei stepped on the gas, and the car slowly moved forward. I leaned back in my seat.

It's been a while since I've ridden in her car. The leather seats are in excellent condition and very comfortable. The aluminum parts around the gearshift are also sparkling clean; you can tell she takes good care of the car.

Her desk was clearly a mess—I almost gave a wry smile. But the thought of never seeing that desk piled high with files, models, instant noodles, and other odds and ends again suddenly filled me with a sense of loneliness. I turned to look out the window.

On the way to my house, orange streetlights appeared and then disappeared. Hiratsuka-sensei knew the route well, humming a tune as she turned the steering wheel.

Suddenly, her singing stopped.

"Let me tell you how hard you've worked."

"Hmm. Although I didn't do anything."

"No, you worked very hard. I wanted to reward you by going for a drink after I'm done, but I have to drive."

"To be honest, I can't drink alcohol..."

Hiratsuka-sensei didn't look at me; she faced forward and gave a wry smile.

"That's true. Looking forward to three years from now."

Upon hearing this, I was speechless for a moment.

I could have just given a casual reply, but instead, I gaped in astonishment. The soft melody from the car stereo filled the silence.